12Stone Church where I have attended for 20+ years (and been on staff for 15 yrs) has grown from 50 people (in regular weekend worship) to over 14,000 during that time. It has been an exciting journey to be a part of…and to watch my friend Kevin Myers grow into an incredible leader.
Recently, he spoke to a gathering of pastors and illustrated the difference between Consultants and Mentors. It was a powerful “a-ha” moment.
- Consulting is when someone does all the work to get inside your head to help you think
- Mentoring is when you get inside their head to discover how they think
- Consulting is when they extract from you
- Mentoring is when you extract from them
Many people will verbalize their desire for a mentor….but what they are really asking for is a consultant. They want someone else to do all the work to figure out how they should grow as a leader. This misunderstanding is why so many people don’t have a mentor – they don’t know how to learn from one.
Kevin described his time learning from John Maxwell. Kevin would invest hours of time in preparation, prior to his time with John. He would create questions to help him understand how John thought. He chased John’s perspective…the vantage point from which Kevin could not see. After the meeting, Kevin would invest many more hours studying his notes to figure out the “gold nuggets” of insight that could be learned.
If you desire a mentor, begin by realizing that you should do most of the work. Learn how to learn from others…without making them do the hard work of getting inside your head.
Thanks for listening.